Christina’s essay annotations

Juicy,​ ​perfectly​ ​marinated,​ ​tender​ ​baby​ ​lamb​ ​chops.​ ​Crisp,​ ​crunchy,​ ​fresh​ ​vegetables. Golden​ ​brown,​ ​cooked​ ​to​ ​perfection​ ​french​ ​fries(sentence structure; french fries, golden brown and cooked to perfection).​ ​This​ ​describes​ ​my​ ​favorite​ ​meal.​ ​Not​ ​only​ ​is​ ​it my​ ​favorite​ ​meal,​ ​but​ ​it​ ​symbolizes​ ​my​ ​culture​ ​and​ ​many​ ​family​ ​events​ ​from​ ​my​ ​childhood. Lamb​ ​is​ ​a​ ​very​ ​symbolic​ ​meat​ ​in​ ​the​ ​Greek​ ​cuisine,​ ​and​ ​it​ ​is​ ​present​ ​on​ ​every​ ​important​ ​holiday, especially​ ​Easter,​ ​birthdays,​ ​and​ ​big​ ​family​ ​events.​ ​Although​ ​my​ ​favorite​ ​style​ ​of​ ​lamb​ ​is​ ​baby lamb​ ​chops,​ ​there​ ​are​ ​many​ ​ways​ ​to​ ​cook​ ​it.​ ​My​ ​Dad​ ​is​ ​the​ ​one​ ​who​ ​learned​ ​all​ ​the​ ​tricks​ ​from his​ ​mom,​ ​my​ ​Yiayia.​ ​She​ ​grew​ ​up​ ​playing​ ​the​ ​true​ ​women​ ​role​ ​while​ ​my​ ​Grandfather​ ​worked, and​ ​brought​ ​my​ ​Dad​ ​and​ ​Aunt​ ​to​ ​the​ ​United​ ​States​ ​when​ ​they​ ​were​ ​7​ ​and​ ​8​ ​years​ ​old.​ ​They​ ​all are​ ​amazing​ ​and​ ​authentic​ ​cooks,​ ​but​ ​my​ ​Dad’s​ ​lamb​ ​chops​ ​and​ ​my​ ​Aunt’s​ ​Greek​ ​salad​ ​have​ ​a special​ ​place​ ​in​ ​my​ ​heart.​ ​Although​ ​many​ ​people​ ​may​ ​just​ ​view​ ​this​ ​meal​ ​as​ ​a​ ​classic​ ​dish​ ​for Greeks,​ ​there​ ​is​ ​a​ ​much​ ​deeper​ ​connection​ ​to​ ​it​ ​within​ ​myself.(good introduction- I like how you introduce both the food and your family well, but not with too much detail)

All​ ​throughout​ ​my​ ​childhood​ ​I​ ​was​ ​immersed​ ​in​ ​the​ ​classic​ ​Greek​ ​culture.​ ​The​ ​laughs that​ ​could​ ​be​ ​heard​ ​by​ ​people​ ​in​ ​the​ ​country​ ​of​ ​Greece,​ ​the​ ​bickering​ ​back​ ​and​ ​forth​ ​between family​ ​members,​ ​delicious​ ​(what​ ​felt​ ​like)​ ​twelve​ ​course​ ​meals​ ​being​ ​cooked,​ ​were​ ​all​ ​too familiar​ ​for​ ​me.​ ​If​ ​you​ ​have​ ​seen​ ​the​ ​movie​ ​​My Big Fat Greek Wedding, ​​then​ ​you​ ​know​ ​that Lamb​ ​is​ ​a​ ​for​ ​sure​ ​classic.​ ​We​ ​serve​ ​it​ ​on​ ​easter​ ​especially​ ​because​ ​it​ ​is​ ​in​ ​honor​ ​of​ ​God​ ​who​ ​was sacrificed​ ​and​ ​rose​ ​again.​ ​I​ ​have​ ​always​ ​eaten​ ​lamb​ ​and​ ​can​ ​remember​ ​having​ ​the​ ​lemon marinade​ ​fill​ ​my​ ​lungs​ ​as​ ​I​ ​stood​ ​by​ ​the​ ​grill​ ​and​ ​my​ ​dad​ ​cooked.​ ​Although​ ​this​ ​meal​ ​is widespread​ ​all​ ​over​ ​this​ ​culture,​ ​my​ ​Dad’s​ ​lamb​ ​chops​ ​are​ ​my​ ​favorite.

An​ ​old​ ​Grandma’s​ ​cook​ ​book​ ​with​ ​tons​ ​of​ ​ancient​ ​ancestor’s​ ​recipes​ ​could​ ​be​ ​compared to​ ​all​ ​the​ ​ways​ ​there​ ​are​ ​to​ ​prepare​ ​lamb.​ ​You​ ​can​ ​get​ ​baby​ ​lamb​ ​chops​ ​and​ ​grill​ ​them,​ ​roast​ ​it​ ​in the​ ​oven​ ​with​ ​potatoes,​ ​roasted​ ​on​ ​a​ ​spit,​ ​with​ ​red​ ​tomato​ ​and​ ​cinnamon​ ​sauce,​ ​a​ ​white​ ​and​ ​egg lemon​ ​based​ ​sauce​ ​and​ ​so​ ​many​ ​more.​ ​In​ ​my​ ​opinion,​ ​my​ ​Dad​ ​makes​ ​the​ ​best​ ​lamb​ ​chops(already mentioned, somewhat redundant).​ ​I think​ ​the​ ​reason​ ​I​ ​like​ ​them​ ​so​ ​much​ ​is​ ​because​ ​he​ ​likes​ ​strong​ ​flavors​ ​just​ ​like​ ​I​ ​do.​ ​My​ ​Dad​ ​will usually​ ​pick​ ​up​ ​1-2​ ​pounds​ ​of​ ​baby​ ​lamb​ ​chops​ ​from​ ​the​ ​butcher,​ ​but​ ​they​ ​definitely​ ​need​ ​to​ ​be fresh.​ ​His​ ​basic​ ​recipe​ ​includes:​ ​“Taking​ ​the​ ​meat​ ​right​ ​from​ ​the​ ​marinade​ ​and​ ​throwing​ ​it​ ​on​ ​the grill.​ ​He​ ​Grills​ ​both​ ​sides​ ​for​ ​2-3​ ​minutes​ ​each​ ​or​ ​until​ ​medium​ ​rare​ ​temperature​ ​is​ ​reached”. Even​ ​thinking​ ​about​ ​it​ ​to​ ​this​ ​day,​ ​I​ ​can​ ​remember​ ​the​ ​specific​ ​view​ ​of​ ​him​ ​preparing​ ​this​ ​meal. The​ ​towel​ ​over​ ​his​ ​shoulder​ ​making​ ​him​ ​look​ ​like​ ​a​ ​classic​ ​chef.​ ​The​ ​salty​ ​sweat​ ​dripping​ ​down his​ ​forehead​ ​and​ ​the​ ​side​ ​of​ ​his​ ​face​ ​as​ ​he​ ​uses​ ​the​ ​sleeve​ ​on​ ​his​ ​shoulder​ ​to​ ​wipe​ ​it​ ​off.​ ​His​ ​big hands,​ ​glistening​ ​with​ ​olive​ ​oil,​ ​massaging​ ​the​ ​meat​ ​as​ ​if​ ​they​ ​are​ ​his​ ​old​ ​arthritis​ ​filled​ ​knees. This​ ​is​ ​the​ ​routine​ ​I​ ​have​ ​grown​ ​up​ ​watching​ ​my​ ​dad​ ​follow,​ ​and​ ​you​ ​can​ ​definitely​ ​say​ ​it​ ​is​ ​my favorite.​ ​One​ ​of​ ​my​ ​favorite​ ​components​ ​is​ ​smelling​ ​the​ ​deliciousness,​(get more specific; what smells are there? Is there the scent of cooking fats mixing with the lemon marinade?) ​even​ ​from​ ​my​ ​bedroom window​ ​above​ ​the​ ​deck.​ ​You​ ​can​ ​watch​ ​the​ ​meat​ ​crispen​ ​and​ ​get​ ​its​ ​juicy​ ​texture​ ​while​ ​the marinade​ ​soaks​ ​into​ ​it.

The​ ​next​ ​part​ ​of​ ​my​ ​favorite​ ​meal​ ​is​ ​a​ ​Greek​ ​salad,​ ​but​ ​without​ ​the​ ​lettuce.​ ​For​ ​this,​ ​the preparation​ ​is​ ​pretty​ ​simple.​ ​My​ ​Aunt​ ​gathers​ ​the​ ​ingredients:​ ​onions,​ ​cucumbers,​ ​fresh​ ​tomato, kalamata​ ​olives,​ ​feta​ ​cheese,​ ​olive​ ​oil,​ ​vinegar,​ ​salt,​ ​and​ ​pepper.​ ​She​ ​stands​ ​there​ ​with​ ​her​ ​sharp knife​ ​and​ ​chops​ ​it​ ​all​ ​up​ ​while​ ​listening​ ​to​ ​the​ ​knife​ ​hit​ ​the​ ​cutting​ ​board.​ ​Then,​ ​she​ ​tosses​ ​it​ ​all​ ​in​ ​the bowl​ ​and​ ​drizzles​ ​about​ ​⅔​ ​olive​ ​oil​ ​and​ ​⅓​ ​vinegar(,)​ ​letting​ ​it​ ​coat​ ​each​ ​individual​ ​piece.​ ​She​ ​then adds​ ​a​ ​pinch​ ​of​ ​salt​ ​and​ ​a​ ​pinch​ ​of​ ​pepper.​ ​I​ ​sat​ ​by​ ​her​ ​side​ ​ever​ ​since​ ​I​ ​can​ ​remember,​ ​my​ ​mouth watering​ ​as​ ​I​ ​craved​ ​the​ ​salad​ ​for​ ​so​ ​long.​ ​The​ ​last​ ​component​ ​to​ ​my​ ​favorite​ ​meal​ ​includes​ ​the french​ ​fries.​ ​All​ ​you​ ​have​ ​to​ ​do​ ​for​ ​this​ ​part​ ​is​ ​skin​ ​the​ ​brown​ ​protective​ ​layer(peel the skin off)​ ​of​ ​the​ ​potatoes​ ​and chop​ ​them​ ​up​ ​into​ ​fries​ ​like​ ​rectangular​ ​prisms.​ ​Then​ ​boil​ ​some​ ​olive​ ​oil,​ ​toss​ ​the​ ​potatoes​ ​in,​ ​and wait​ ​until​ ​they​ ​are​ ​a​ ​crispy,​ ​golden,​ ​brown.​ ​Although​ ​this​ ​meal​ ​makes​ ​my​ ​taste​ ​buds​ ​extremely satisfied(how does it satisfy them? What are your favorite flavors in the meal, what types of textures stand out most? Being satisfied is too broad for such a specific meal),​ ​my​ ​favorite​ ​thing​ ​about​ ​this​ ​meal​ ​is​ ​the​ ​thoughts​ ​that​ ​fill​ ​my​ ​head​ ​with​ ​joy​ ​from​ ​my childhood.

Most​ ​of​ ​my​ ​fondest​ ​meal​ ​memories​ ​are​ ​with​ ​family​ ​and​ ​my​ ​Dad​ ​cooking​ ​lamb​ ​chops​ ​as​ ​a child.​ ​As​ ​my​ ​Dad​ ​said,​ ​“Christina​ ​was​ ​three​ ​years​ ​old​ ​and​ ​I​ ​remember​ ​her​ ​coming​ ​by​ ​the​ ​grill and​ ​standing​ ​there​ ​watching​ ​me​ ​cook.​ ​She​ ​kept​ ​constantly​ ​saying​ ​how​ ​good​ ​it​ ​smelled​ ​and​ ​that she​ ​wanted​ ​to​ ​try​ ​a​ ​piece.​ ​I​ ​must​ ​say​ ​it​ ​was​ ​love​ ​at​ ​first​ ​bite.​ ​She​ ​ate​ ​the​ ​entire​ ​lamb​ ​chop​ ​licking the​ ​bone​ ​to​ ​the​ ​very​ ​end”.​ ​Clearly,​ ​I​ ​was​ ​very​ ​young​ ​when​ ​my​ ​Dad​ ​first​ ​introduced​ ​me​ ​to​ ​these mouth​ ​watering​ ​slivers​ ​of​ ​meat.​ ​At​ ​any​ ​family​ ​event​ ​we​ ​host​ ​or​ ​attend,​ ​I​ ​ask​ ​my​ ​Dad​ ​if​ ​he​ ​will​ ​be making​ ​them.​ ​As​ ​a​ ​child​ ​I​ ​aspired​ ​to​ ​be​ ​the​ ​next​ ​Cake​ ​Boss,​ ​making​ ​me​ ​indulge​ ​in​ ​any​ ​cooking or​ ​baking​ ​that​ ​was​ ​happening​ ​around​ ​me.​ ​I​ ​loved​ ​being​ ​by​ ​his​ ​side​ ​to​ ​steal​ ​a​ ​piece​ ​of​ ​meat​ ​to foreshadow​ ​what​ ​was​ ​to​ ​come,​ ​almost​ ​like​ ​a​ ​seagull​ ​at​ ​the​ ​beach. (good organization. The description of you watching him make the meal is excellent, as well as the relationship you had with your father while making it.)

As​ ​a​ ​child,​ ​my​ ​Dad​ ​spent​ ​a​ ​lot​ ​of​ ​time​ ​traveling​ ​for​ ​work.​ ​He​ ​would​ ​go​ ​to​ ​Japan​ ​every​ ​six weeks,​ ​and​ ​in​ ​between​ ​that​ ​travel​ ​to​ ​the​ ​West​ ​coast​ ​as​ ​well​ ​as​ ​various​ ​other​ ​places.​ ​I​ ​learned​ ​to get​ ​used​ ​to​ ​this​ ​lifestyle​ ​because​ ​I​ ​know​ ​he​ ​was​ ​working​ ​and​ ​making​ ​money​ ​so​ ​that​ ​my​ ​four siblings​ ​and​ ​I​ ​could​ ​have​ ​everything​ ​we​ ​wanted​ ​and​ ​more.​ ​I​ ​am​ ​extremely​ ​appreciative​ ​of​ ​him and​ ​all​ ​the​ ​hard​ ​work​ ​he​ ​does,​ ​but​ ​this​ ​was​ ​also​ ​a​ ​difficult​ ​aspect​ ​of​ ​my​ ​life.​ ​By​ ​not​ ​having​ ​my Dad​ ​around​ ​for​ ​some​ ​major​ ​events​ ​because​ ​he​ ​had​ ​to​ ​be​ ​halfway​ ​around​ ​the​ ​world,​ ​it​ ​made​ ​me appreciate​ ​having​ ​him​ ​home​ ​even​ ​more.​ ​Growing​ ​up,​ ​when​ ​we​ ​would​ ​have​ ​lamb​ ​chops​ ​for dinner​ ​or​ ​for​ ​a​ ​special​ ​occasion,​ ​it​ ​meant​ ​that​ ​my​ ​dad​ ​was​ ​home​ ​with​ ​us​ ​to​ ​cook​ ​them.​ ​It​ ​meant that​ ​he​ ​wasn’t​ ​half​ ​way​ ​around​ ​the​ ​world,​ ​it​ ​meant​ ​that​ ​I​ ​could​ ​sit​ ​down​ ​with​ ​him​ ​and​ ​catch​ ​up, and​ ​it​ ​meant​ ​that​ ​my​ ​family​ ​would​ ​be​ ​whole​ ​again.

My​ ​other​ ​connection​ ​to​ ​this​ ​meal​ ​is​ ​with​ ​the​ ​salad.​ ​My​ ​Dad’s​ ​sister,​ ​my​ ​Auntie​ ​Georgia, makes​ ​the​ ​best​ ​version​ ​of​ ​this​ ​mixed​ ​perfection.​ ​I​ ​am​ ​very​ ​close​ ​with​ ​her​ ​as​ ​she​ ​is​ ​my Godmother,​ ​but​ ​she​ ​has​ ​cancer.​ ​The​ ​crispness​ ​of​ ​the​ ​onions,​ ​juice​ ​of​ ​the​ ​olives,​ ​taste​ ​of​ ​the​ ​feta cheese,​ ​and​ ​all​ ​the​ ​ingredients​ ​mixed​ ​together​ ​is​ ​like​ ​a​ ​party​ ​in​ ​my​ ​mouth.(this would fit well after your description of how the salad is made)​ ​One​ ​of​ ​the​ ​main​ ​things I​ ​like​ ​about​ ​this​ ​salad​ ​is​ ​how​ ​there​ ​is​ ​no​ ​lettuce​ ​in​ ​it,​ ​which​ ​allows​ ​you​ ​to​ ​get​ ​the​ ​full,​ ​powerful taste​ ​of​ ​all​ ​the​ ​individual​ ​ingredients​ ​without​ ​the​ ​lettuce​ ​making​ ​it(making it what?).​ ​My​ ​Auntie​ ​Georgia​ ​is​ ​a​ ​very important​ ​part​ ​of​ ​my​ ​life​ ​and​ ​the​ ​way​ ​she​ ​prepares​ ​it​ ​for​ ​me​ ​with​ ​crisp​ ​bread​ ​every​ ​time​ ​I​ ​go​ ​to her​ ​house​ ​makes​ ​me​ ​happy(seems like it makes you more than just “happy”. Maybe describe more).​ ​I​ ​enjoy​ ​the​ ​meals​ ​that​ ​I​ ​get​ ​to​ ​have​ ​this​ ​salad​ ​because​ ​it​ ​specifically reminds​ ​me​ ​of​ ​her.​ ​Many​ ​memories​ ​from​ ​my​ ​childhood​ ​make​ ​this​ ​my​ ​favorite​ ​mean​ ​to​ ​eat.

When​ ​I​ ​was​ ​around​ ​10​ ​years​ ​old,​ ​I​ ​found​ ​out​ ​that​ ​my​ ​Auntie​ ​Georgia​ ​has​ ​cancer.​ ​My​ ​Dad took​ ​us​ ​to​ ​a​ ​local​ ​ice​ ​cream​ ​shop​ ​in​ ​our​ ​hometown​ ​called​ ​Stillwell’s,​ ​and​ ​I​ ​remember​ ​him​ ​sitting us​ ​down​ ​and​ ​breaking​ ​the​ ​news.​ ​I​ ​could​ ​feel​ ​my​ ​eyes​ ​fill​ ​with​ ​tears​ ​as​ ​my​ ​appetite​ ​for​ ​my​ ​vanilla soft​ ​serve​ ​with​ ​rainbow​ ​sprinkles​ ​went​ ​down​ ​the​ ​drain,​ ​which​ ​has​ ​never​ ​happened​ ​before.​ ( good details, but organization seems a little off. It jumps between your aunt’s cancer and the reasons the salad is special. Maybe focus on one first, then transition to the other)

Since my​ ​aunt​ ​is​ ​sick,​ ​I​ ​think​ ​the​ ​reason​ ​I​ ​love​ ​her​ ​salad​ ​so​ ​much​ ​is​ ​because​ ​it​ ​means​ ​that​ ​she​ ​is​ ​safe and​ ​I​ ​am​ ​still​ ​able​ ​to​ ​spend​ ​time​ ​with​ ​her.​ ​I’m​ ​not​ ​sure​ ​how​ ​many​ ​more​ ​times​ ​I​ ​will​ ​be​ ​able​ ​to​ ​eat multiple​ ​bowls​ ​of​ ​this​ ​salad​ ​with​ ​her​ ​in​ ​my​ ​presence,​ ​but​ ​I​ ​do​ ​know​ ​that​ ​whenever​ ​I​ ​take​ ​over​ ​the role​ ​of​ ​making​ ​this​ ​salad,​ ​I​ ​will​ ​always​ ​have​ ​her​ ​in​ ​mind.

Lamb​ ​chops,​ ​Greek​ ​salad,​ ​and​ ​french​ ​fries​ ​may​ ​seem​ ​like​ ​just​ ​an​ ​ordinary​ ​meal,​ ​but​ ​I have​ ​a​ ​deep​ ​connection​ ​with​ ​it.​ ​The​ ​Greek​ ​culture​ ​that​ ​I​ ​grew​ ​up​ ​in​ ​is​ ​a​ ​huge​ ​part​ ​of​ ​who​ ​I​ ​am and​ ​why​ ​I​ ​love​ ​this​ ​meal,​ ​the​ ​way​ ​my​ ​Dad​ ​prepares​ ​it,​ ​and​ ​the​ ​memories​ ​that​ ​flow​ ​back​ ​are​ ​the most​ ​important​ ​reasons​ ​why​ ​I​ ​love​ ​this​ ​meal.​ ​The​ ​smell​ ​of​ ​the​ ​chops​ ​cooking​ ​,​ ​crispness​ ​of​ ​the vegetables​ ​in​ ​the​ ​salad,​ ​and​ ​comfort​ ​in​ ​the​ ​french​ ​fries​ ​bring​ ​back​ ​many​ ​memories​ ​which​ ​fill​ ​my heart​ ​with​ ​warmth.​ ​It​ ​isn’t​ ​just​ ​the​ ​deliciousness​ ​of​ ​the​ ​food,​ ​it’s​ ​being​ ​able​ ​to​ ​have​ ​my​ ​Dad home​ ​with​ ​me​ ​and​ ​my​ ​Aunt​ ​safe. (Solid conclusion; touches on all the points in the essay, and reiterates the emotional connotations of the meal itself)

Overall, the essay has a good level of detail and emotion, with great descriptions of meal preparation. It is easy to visualize you by your father or aunt making these meals and watching them cook and get put together. However, the descriptions of the food and how it smells/tastes is lacking in some parts of the essay. Simply stating the food smells or tastes delicious or is satisfying isn’t enough, especially considering how vividly you described the process of making it. Adding descriptions about the tastes, textures and smells of the meal would add a great amount of depth. Also, there seems to be some disorganization and redundancy within some paragraphs, specifically paragraphs  3, 7 and 8. The ideas in paragraphs 7 and 8 seem to be similar enough where they can be molded together, taking the best parts from both and eliminating the rest. Aside from that, the essay is solid and the overall organization of ideas works well.

Sean’s essay annotations

More Than a Meal

I shove the door to my grandparents house open and immediately I am hit with the dense, warm aroma of a delicious thanksgiving meal being cooked. My mouth instantaneously begins to water and my stomach growls like an angry pack of wolves. I hug my grandparents and although I am happy to see them, I can’t help but remain focused on the exquisite meal that I am about to devour, and they understand because they feel the same way I do. The seconds feel like hours and the minutes feel like days as I await for the feast to be complete, and when it finally is, I can’t even decide what I want to put on my plate first. My eyes survey the soft mashed potatoes that look like moist clouds, the golden-brown stuffing, the flakey rolls, and most importantly, the tender, yet perfectly moist turkey. I put a little of everything on my plate and sit down and begin to attack my plate. Every bite is utter bliss and despite my extreme hunger, I savor every bite and enjoy the moment because I recognize that the remaining Thanksgiving dinners I’ll share with my family is unfortunately finite. I look around at the rest of my family surrounding me at the table and notice how they interact, laughing and joking with each other, yet still creating a lingering feeling of togetherness.(Im assuming this is your thesis statement; it does a very good job connecting to the rest of your essay. It addresses both the happiness in the moment and the future importance the meal will have) The Thanksgiving feast that my grandparents cook for our family every year never ceases to amaze me and is my favorite meal, not only because of the varying delicious foods that comprise it, but because of the enlightening effect it has on my family, the vivid memories of eating the meal as a child, and the positive feelings of happiness and love mixed with the feelings of nostalgia and that arise while eating it.(Excellent introduction. Honestly have no negative feedback for this)

For my family and I, our Thanksgiving celebration and our delicious feast signifies more than meets the eye; the meal has a deeper value for us. I feel that many people really forget the true meaning of each holiday and we begin to take them for granted and just think of them as a day where we get together and eat food, and in some instances give and receive presents. Although my family does participate in those practices that hundreds of millions of people also participate in world-wide, we never forget the true meaning and value of each holiday. When I look at the meal in from of me on Thanksgiving, I see more than just turkey, stuffing, potatoes, and vegetables. I see the value and the meaning of it. When I look down at my filled plate, I think of how lucky I am to be able to have such a loving family, be eating such a wholesome meal, and how lucky I am to live the life I live. The meal also signifies time I get to spend with my family catching up and visiting with them. I don’t see my family too often because of how busy all of our schedules are, as all of my cousins, including myself, are either in college or have graduated and have busy jobs and my aunts and uncles all have hectic adult lives as well. But, when we do get together, it is very special and I value the time I spend with my family very much.(The only thing I would add is what your family is like. What are their personalities, and how does this impact the importance of the meal?)

The wonderful Thanksgiving dish also evokes many feelings from within me, one of those being a certain sense of nostalgia. Although my Thanksgiving celebrations with my family aren’t in my past, when I look down at my plate and see the same food I have eaten every Thanksgiving for my entire life, it brings me back to when I was younger and what my perception was at that time. I can remember one Thanksgiving in particular, I was probably about six or seven years old, and I sat at the table and thought about how much younger and smaller I felt than everyone else. I am the youngest in my family by about two or three years, so when I was younger, everyone else was much bigger than me. I don’t know why, but I think about how I felt at that Thanksgiving every single year and laugh at how much things have changed some twelve years later. Although somewhat depressing and pessimistic of myself, the meal also evokes some sadness in me because I know that I won’t be able to have that meal forever and some day, I won’t celebrate Thanksgiving with the people I have for my entire life. Yet, at the same time, I feel happy because for the time being, I still have time with my family left, and many delicious Thanksgiving meals courtesy of my grandmother left to eat.

Upon talking to my grandmother and grandfather about what this dish means to them, no matter what they said, their answers always went back to the reoccurring theme of family. My grandmother, when asked what making the dish meant to her, she explained that “[she] had always taught the kids that family was the most important thing. Thanksgiving isn’t only about the food, it’s about family. Family is the biggest thing” and that is what they thought about while making the dish. (quote implementation is good and makes sense, and is well integrated into your writing)My grandparents had always instilled the value of family into my mom and her brothers, and it is very evident because they all live within a ten mile radius and talk several times every week. Although my grandparents have explained the value of family to me hundreds of times, they didn’t really think that the reason I liked the dish was because of the family aspect. My grandmother thought that I liked the dish because of just the food and my grandfather exclaimed “He doesn’t have to make it!”, which lined up perfectly with his humorous personality(what other aspects are there to his personality and your grandmother? What is it like interacting with them outside of thanksgiving, and what effect does this have overall to the meal?). But, to their surprise, I explained to them that most of what I had written about was how much the family aspect of the holiday meant to me and how the meal signified something larger than just food. They both agreed that this was also their favorite meal, as my grandmother stated that “On Thanksgiving, the whole family usually can make it so we are all together, but on Christmas sometimes people are working or have other places to be, so its really special when everyone is together” which truly resembles the essence of a holiday.

Overall, this dish is so meaningful to my family and I not just because of the food we are actually eating, but because of the value and the feelings that it brings. It means that my entire family comes together on a day to give thanks for what we have and truly appreciate each other. Although some people of my age may not understand the true meaning of holidays and think they are cheesy, which at some times can be true, to be able to come together with your family to share a meal is an unbelievable privilege. At the end of the day, holidays are more than what we are actually eating, but what we are doing while we eat and who we share the meal with.

This essay is very well-written and organized. The thesis statement is solid, quote implementation is seamless and makes sense, and the descriptions of the food are vividly detailed. In terms of what could be added, I think the biggest thing is describing your family more. The reader knows that you have a good relationship with them, but doesn’t know much about their personalities aside from that. Adding more parts like the one describing your grandfather’s comical personality will help the reader empathize with and understand the importance of the meal more. Also, adding a more detailed description of how your family interacts, what their personalities are and why the meal dynamic works so well would really drive the point of how important the meal really is. If you’re looking for more details to add aside from that, maybe talking about how the food tastes in more detail could add some depth. However, your excellent description of what the meal looks and smells like may be enough.

Journal #4

In this section of They Say I Say, new methods of writing, particularly argumentative and academic essays, are investigated. Typically in a high school level writing class, students are taught to formulate an opinion on a particular issue, gather evidence in support of that issue, and write an essay on it. This only presents the reader to one very narrow point of view on an issue, and leaves no room for insight or questioning. This section, however, introduces methods and templates to combat this mundane style of writing. It teaches the reader how to employ not only the thoughts and ideas that support you more effectively, but also teaches how to use the words and opinions of dissenting voices within an essay. It does this by providing templates of introducing different types of quotes. The part of the reading I found most important was how to explain quotes in context. If quotes are simply inserted randomly within an essay, then the reader is left confused about what the point of the quote is. However, when the quote is properly introduced and explained, the reader is able to see why the quote is important and draw more information from it. It also shows the reader how to use opposing opinions by explaining why the opposition has a point, but then providing counter-evidence, thus nullifying their argument. This is important because it answers the reader’s questions about the opposing opinions, broadening their perspective while also strengthening your argument.

Journal #1

In the piece of writing Consider the Lobster by David Foster Wallace, the idea of the Maine tradition of cooking lobster, as well as cooking lobster itself, is looked into with much greater detail than would normally be used. He discusses the cruel ways in which lobster is cooked, from being boiled alive, steamed, or having it’s limbs and tail cut off. It forces the reader to question the humanity of these traditions, and whether or not this tradition should be continued as a result. The reason this piece of writing is so interesting and unique is because it not only explores an obscure topic, but also because it provides evidence and perspectives from both sides of the argument. It employs people from both sides, using their opinions as well as quoting them, to build an overall broader perspective on the issue. Normally, writing like this uses perspectives from one side, supporting an opinion that is usually held by the writer. The implications of these unique aspects of his writing is that it opens up the reader to a different way of looking at things. Rather than grab evidence in support of your cause and using it in an argument, this opens people up to the idea of gaining a full perspective on an issue before formulating an opinion. It also forces people to factor in the unknown, and accept that not everything can be known about every topic being investigated. Sometimes, these unknown bits of information could be the deciding factor in winning an argument. However, without this information available, different areas information must be investigated to form the best possible opinion.

Journal #2

Throughout my writing career, I’ve had many different experiences drafting my own writing projects. With certain topics, writing comes easy to me, and all I need to do is create a broad outline of my ideas and develop them as I write. Other times, drafting can be extremely difficult, and I need to rewrite an entire essay to convey my ideas properly. However, My drafting process usually follows the same general layout and accomplishes the same goal every time. Before I start writing, I always create some type of outline for my work, and sort out where I want to put the ideas in my head. Generally, I think of the body paragraphs first, so I can properly introduce the ideas I have and want to convey in my writing. Once this is done, I gather my evidence and sort it in a way that will make the most sense and impact on the reader. Once this is done, I plan my first paragraph and create a broad introduction with a hook that relates the introduction to what I’m writing about. Then, once I write the essay, I check to see whether more evidence will better support my point, and if the order the essay is in makes the most sense. If not, I begin editing, rearranging and gathering more evidence to fix the problems. After this is done, I check what will be my final draft for simple sentence and structural errors, and make sure that I tie my evidence to my ideas in the best way possible. Once this is done, I edit my introductory and concluding paragraphs so they match all my new ideas.

Throughout my writing career, I’ve had many different experiences drafting my own writing projects. With certain topics, writing comes easy to me, and all I need to do is create a broad outline of my ideas and develop them as I write. Other times, drafting can be extremely difficult, and I need to rewrite an entire essay to convey my ideas properly. However, My drafting process usually follows the same general layout and accomplishes the same goal every time. Before I start writing, I always create some type of outline for my work, and sort out where I want to put the ideas in my head. Generally, I think of the body paragraphs first, so I can properly introduce the ideas I have and want to convey in my writing. Once this is done, I gather my evidence and sort it in a way that will make the most sense and impact on the reader. Once this is done, I plan my first paragraph and create a broad introduction with a hook that relates the introduction to what I’m writing about. Then, once I write the essay, I check to see whether more evidence will better support my point, and if the order the essay is in makes the most sense. If not, I begin editing, rearranging and gathering more evidence to fix the problems. After this is done, I check what will be my final draft for simple sentence and structural errors, and make sure that I tie my evidence to my ideas in the best way possible. Once this is done, I edit my introductory and concluding paragraphs so they match all my new ideas.

Throughout my writing career, I’ve had many different experiences drafting my own writing projects. With certain topics, writing comes easy to me, and all I need to do is create a broad outline of my ideas and develop them as I write. Other times, drafting can be extremely difficult, and I need to rewrite an entire essay to convey my ideas properly. However, My drafting process usually follows the same general layout and accomplishes the same goal every time. Before I start writing, I always create some type of outline for my work, and sort out where I want to put the ideas in my head. Generally, I think of the body paragraphs first, so I can properly introduce the ideas I have and want to convey in my writing. Once this is done, I gather my evidence and sort it in a way that will make the most sense and impact on the reader. Once this is done, I plan my first paragraph and create a broad introduction with a hook that relates the introduction to what I’m writing about. Then, once I write the essay, I check to see whether more evidence will better support my point, and if the order the essay is in makes the most sense. If not, I begin editing, rearranging and gathering more evidence to fix the problems. After this is done, I check what will be my final draft for simple sentence and structural errors, and make sure that I tie my evidence to my ideas in the best way possible. Once this is done, I edit my introductory and concluding paragraphs so they match all my new ideas.

Journal #3

It is a warm, breezy Spring day in the middle of a busy Pennsylvania highway. The air is sweet, fresh with the scent of fresh grown leaves and grass. The breeze is cooling, enough to prevent sweating but not so much to create discomfort. The sky is free of clouds, and the sun sits in the center of the sky. The scent of emissions begins to pick up, as more and more cars travel along the road. The sound of cars passing by increases; the rubber of the tires gripping the road, and the air whizzing as cars pass through it. Sunlight reflects off the car paint, sparkling sporadically and beautifully with great luminescence. Suddenly, something goes awry. A small, blue car loses control, screeching as it fishtails back and forth across the road. The brakes scream and rubber burns off the tires, leaving distinct marks on the road. The front right side of the car smashes into the back left side of a small white pickup truck, crumpling the metal and sending the truck into the center of the lanes. More cars come from behind, unable to stop in time to prevent a collision. They too crash into the truck, demolishing it and the front of their vehicles. Metal crumples and bends as the force of the impact tears it apart, creating a deafening sound. Windows shatter, and people can be heard screaming in their cars. The collision is over as fast as it started; the smell of gasoline permeates the air, whisking away the pleasant smell of spring. The breeze brings more unpleasant scents with it: burning rubber, fuel, and oil. People begin to get out of their cars, bloodied and injured. Glass spills out of car doors and off of dashboards. The bent hinges squeak as they are forced open. Light reflects off the newly created bends in the metal, sending beams out in random directions. The beauty of spring fades, as a new scene of carnage emerges on the highway.

Journal #3

Throughout my writing career, I’ve had many different experiences drafting my own writing projects. With certain topics, writing comes easy to me, and all I need to do is create a broad outline of my ideas and develop them as I write. Other times, drafting can be extremely difficult, and I need to rewrite an entire essay to convey my ideas properly. However, My drafting process usually follows the same general layout and accomplishes the same goal every time. Before I start writing, I always create some type of outline for my work, and sort out where I want to put the ideas in my head. Generally, I think of the body paragraphs first, so I can properly introduce the ideas I have and want to convey in my writing. Once this is done, I gather my evidence and sort it in a way that will make the most sense and impact on the reader. Once this is done, I plan my first paragraph and create a broad introduction with a hook that relates the introduction to what I’m writing about. Then, once I write the essay, I check to see whether more evidence will better support my point, and if the order the essay is in makes the most sense. If not, I begin editing, rearranging and gathering more evidence to fix the problems. After this is done, I check what will be my final draft for simple sentence and structural errors, and make sure that I tie my evidence to my ideas in the best way possible. Once this is done, I edit my introductory and concluding paragraphs so they match all my new ideas.

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